Monday, July 06, 2009


With poll automation now on track, large-scale electoral fraud will be neat and efficient. No more hiring of goons or flying voters, herding of the electorate, grabbing ballot boxes, substituting ballots, bribing precinct personnel, etc.

Who says our country is still an antediluvian Third World nation left behind by other Asian and African states? At least, we will have gone high-tech in one area: fraudulent poll canvassing. Thanks to Garci and Bedol who are reported to have just enrolled in a crony computer school taking up 'Automation 101' and 'The Basics of a Manufactured Mandate in Poll Automation.'

The computerization of the Comelec's canvassing process would thus make it possible for the administration to engage in high-tech fraud, against which the opposition (ho-hum) can mount no counter measures, short of dynamiting the computers themselves. The trial runs of the computers that will soon take place before administration people in the executive and legislative branches will certainly suggest how easily the machines can be manipulated to doctor the election returns. The opposition must be present as well because if and when they are in power, they too shall have to learn the ropes manipulating these machines.

Perhaps, if the computerization of the election process envisions that the voter's choices will be represented by punches on a card, the punched card will be fed into a portfolio-size card reader, and the results collated at the provincial capitol where Comelec supervisors will man a central computer. The result? The winning cheater will be known in just a few days.

Ferrum Mann has a brilliant definition of the various computer terms presently being mastered by Garci and Bedol in a crony computer school, perhaps located somewhere in Guadalupe:

COBOL (Cheating Operations in Bangsamoro-Occupied Lands)
BASIC (Bello's Antipolo Sweatshop to Impose Counterfeits)
FORTRAN (Forgery Operations to Replace True Results by Addition and Negation)
PASCAL (Police and Armed Soldiers Colluding with the Administration's Lapdogs)
WINDOWS VISTA (Winner Is Now Decided Offline in the Warehouse, before Shipping; Vote Is Switched To Administration)

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