Friday, March 20, 2009


PULPIT FICTION

Question: What is the difference between alcoholics and drunkards?
Answer: Alcoholics attend meetings. Drunkards cancel them.

So, I guess it is now safe to conclude that when my former pastor is in the South, he is an alcoholic. And when he is in the North, he metamorphs into a drunkard. Figure that out yourself.

I say "former," because that is all he ever will be to me in many ways. Former pastor, former friend, former confidant, former colleague, former counselor, former life-coach and former fellow-runner of the race.

I find it really funny and stupid that a supposedly prosperity preacher would resort to peddling bracelets and necklaces on the side, that when worn would make one achieve superhuman qualities. "Super-gulang" qualities perhaps? That probably explains why to this day he continues to use our church name without permission from us. But the other one thing I really would take him to task here is why does he have to get in touch with members of our church and meet them and vend all these nonsensical items? I can always do the same to his church, but I'd like to think of myself as one who is decent and has moral values and respect for someone else's sheep. But my former pastor (okay, let's address him now as "John Doe," does that sound close enough for you?) would be the opposite, and would poach on waters not in his turf. I say "poach" because that is really what he has been doing - fishing unlawfully. A poacher is by nature one who doesn't care how he catches his meal for the day, just as long as he gets it and does so in a "quick, before I get caught" fashion. And this action of his is a blatant display of arrogance and hypocrisy which has to be addressed immediately. If you ask me, I believe he should be fired again from his current church in the same manner we fired him when he resorted to alcohol abuse resulting to drunkenness and immoral behavior unbecoming of a pastor and "life-coach," which was happening nightly to this day. He continues to bring shame and toxicity to the noble vocation of being a pastor. His accountability pastor was even so surprised to find out during one of their counseling sessions that our John Doe was devastated to have lost a huge amount of monthly income, but didn't care at all losing the ministry. But I really am not surprised at this revelation. You, a prosperity preacher? Whose prosperity are we talking about here? You and your cabal of "Tupperware salesmen" I'm sure. (with apologies to all former Tupperware salespeople for this unfair comparison). Step down and bring back decency in the title "Pastor." Step down and shed off that sheep's clothing and run off like a rabid lone wolf in search of its pack. Otherwise, I may be forced to declare the Hunting Season as "OPEN."

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